Freedom from Shame

Patricia writes:
> After praying that a soul tie be severed, when does the freedom from
> that soul tie begin?  When does the shame stop?

Dear Patricia,

Every journey to healing is different, Patricia. It’s much like when we first get saved. Some pray to receive Jesus and literally feel the weight of their sins lifted off them and never feel a serious temptation to go back to the old strongholds. Others struggle for years before getting the victory.

Either way, when we repent, God forgives instantly. Sometimes, though we still have to struggle with the consequences, such as a soul tie–which is simply a fancy word for human bonding, which is seen in the parent-child relationship, between siblings, and close friends as well as in romantic relationships. The soul tie is why breaking up hurts so bad and is a big reason sexual sin can be so difficult to overcome.

Shame is a different issue entirely, though. The devil wants to see the husband-wife tie severed and to keep in tact those ties we don’t have, so he’ll contrive ways to see you back in bondage. You can’t let a fear of backsliding rule you, but you do have to be alert to his schemes. One of which is shame.

It’s possible to no longer be bonded to the person, to no longer feel a pain over not being with them, no longer desire it on any level, to no longer harbor romantic feelings for them, in short, to be totally free of the soul tie, and still be continually reminded by the devil of the sin you committed with them and made to feel dirty and condemned.

The devil is the accuser of the brethren. He finds something to shame all of us about. At some point, we need to say, “Enough is enough. That was then, this is now. I am washed, I am sanctified, I am filled with the Holy Spirit, and made righteous and clean in every way! The past is past. I am a new creation in Christ; the old things are passed away, the new has come. I’m going to forget those things which lay behind and reach for those things that lay head, pressing for the mark for the prize of the high calling in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

It’s scripture. We don’t have to “feel it.” We have to believe it and declare it over ourselves in faith until we do feel it.

When we finally stand up to him, and make it clear we mean it, the devil flees. Even if he comes back again later, every time we stand fast in the liberty by which Christ has made us free, we get stronger and our enemy weaker.

But sometimes, we need someone to come beside us and lift us up in 1 on 1 counseling/mentoring, preferably with your pastor, or a sister in your local church body (or community at least) who is trained in biblical counseling.


In Christ’s Victory,

Andrea Graham
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